WS Section 31-35

After reading sections 31-35 out of our textbook, I conclude that it is just a overview of what Dr. Sonia Begert has been going over with us in class.

• Section 31 Introductory Paragraph
• Section 32 Body Paragraph
• Section 33 The Concluding Paragraph
• Section 34 Paragraph Hooks and Transitions - a paragraph hook is a device used to connect one paragraph to another smoothly. While transition usually connects one sentence to another. (examples of hooks and transitions: "The second step" serves as a hook; "consequently" serves as a transition word)
• Section 35 Guidelines for Writing a Good Essay. It goes over the fifteen steps to helping you write a good paper. These steps below are the ones mentioned, that I plan to follow whiling writing my thesis-Driven essay:

1. Think through the topic sentence.
2. Consider the audience and purpose.
3. Formulate your thesis sentence.
4. Evaluate your thesis sentence for audience appeal and specific purpose.
5. Outline your essay.
6. Determine what support to include-examples, details, descriptions.
7. Write a preliminary/first draft.
8. Edit your draft.
9. Have a classmate respond to the draft.
10. Revise the second draft.
11. Get more feedback.
12. Revise accordingly.
13. Proofread and correct.
14. Write (type) your final draft.
15. Submit your final draft.

We have been going over outlines, paragraph structure, rough drafts, proofreading, etc. I have my outline, my thesis statement, my concluding paragraphs to follow giving specific to the general thesis statement. I have had numerous rough drafts, proofread both in class and by other people I know, and have just completed rewriting the essay for the fourth time. I feel this information was very helpful and informative.

Rough Draft II / Thesis-Driven Essay OBSERVATION ON EDUCATION Paper #2

An Outstanding Teacher

     When Mrs. Montgomery was my sixth grade teacher at MacDonald Elementary, she was known as one of the school districts most outstanding teachers. She was accredited for her teaching skills because she was able to help her students set and meet goals, made learning fun and interesting, was an advocate for children’s self-esteem, was always there for her students, and promoted lifelong learning that would follow students into adulthood.

     "We are the only ones responsible for our futures!" said Mrs. Montgomery as she helped us set and meet our goals. Often she would remind us that our goals should be set in small steps to ensure we would succeed each one. She helped her students stay focused and emphasized her wisdom as she kept us mindful of our choices we would make that would reflect our future. In the beginning of school year, she would have us write our goals down on a sheet of paper. Along with our list of goals, she would also have us write a letter to ourselves reminding us of the goals we had set for ourselves. As we worked toward meeting our goals through the school year, she would walk and coach us when needed. During the summer she would mail the letters and your goal lists from the beginning of the school year. Being able to see all our individual accomplishments you achieved; prepared and empowered you for the next school year. As an adult, I see all my educational achievements and owe a lot of my successions to Mrs. Montgomery for her dedication in the education of her students.

     I am sure we have all encountered the feeling of “boredom” in learning within the classroom. Mrs. Montgomery had the ability to ease that feeling. She had the art of sparking imagination in all her students. No matter what subject, she opened creativity and she always made sure it was fun and interesting.

     Our sixth grade’s favorite history project was learning about different cultures within countries around the world. Mrs. Montgomery called it, “Dinner around the World.”  Each group of students was assigned a country in which we had to prepare week-long projects. Each group was to write a report and transform their school desks into the “Customs Booth” for their assigned country. The booth was to be displayed with the country’s flag, facts, and chart of statistics. On Friday, all groups were to bring in a special food dish to share with the class which the country was known for. Since my group was assigned Sweden, our special food dish we prepared was Swedish meatballs, that my mom instructed us how to make.

     The next day our classroom looked like an International tourist extravaganza. The aroma of food from America, Italy, Mexico, to China filled the air in the classroom and down the hallways. Our pretend passports were stamped at every customs booth.  By the end of our day long adventure; we had chased Leprechauns in Ireland, walked the Great Wall of China, danced the Polka in Poland, rowed in the Gondola down the Grand Canal of Venice in Italy, celebrated Cinco de Mayo in Mexico, ran with the bulls in Spain, had tea and crumpets with the Queen of England, and toured The Eiffel Tower in Paris, France. Although we didn’t want to end our trip around the world so quickly, it was time to head back to the United States so we could clean up and head home for the weekend.

     Along with the fun and exciting times, Mrs. Montgomery also had her serious side too. She was an advocate for children’s self-esteem and she believed that teachers played a major role in developing this in a child. Mrs. Montgomery took pride in watching her students achieve. No matter if the achievement was big or small; she would let you know how proud she was of you. When there were failures, she would encourage us to pick ourselves back up and try again. To make us feel better, she would slip in a triumph or failure of her own to let us know that if she made it this far, she knew we could go even further. She had passion, encouragement, and a gentle way of helping everyone out in their own special way.

     Mrs. Montgomery was an inspiration to all her students. She always treated us as if we were her own children. Her love and compassion showed true in all she did for us. One of the very first things I remember her telling our sixth grade class was, “No matter what, I will always be here for you.”, and she held true to her word.

     I had been jaded by my previous experience in the fifth grade. I was sure that having to repeat the fifth grade and having previous educational challenges was going to follow me to my new school.  With an open mind and a smile she welcomed me into her fifth grade Science and English class that year. She knew of my frustrations and sadness in my education history. No matter what, she would always arrange special one on one time for me, as she did for all her students when needed.

     Mrs. Montgomery promoted lifelong learning that has carried me through all of life’s obstacles. She would always tell our class that no matter what challenges come our way in life we had to stay positive and you will be able to find the good out of any bad situation. She instilled in us that no matter how old you are, you are never too old to learn new thing.

     It had been 17 years since I spoke with Mrs. Montgomery, but just the other day on Facebook I located her. I let her know that I think of her often and continue to teach my children on a daily basis the life-long lessons she taught our sixth grade class. We talked about the past and present, how I have been able to find the good out of the many bad situations that have come my way. I have made my lemonade with the lemons God has given me. She asked me if I had any regrets in life, I told her only one…..not going to college right out of high school. She was overjoyed to hear I returned to college and she said, “You are never too old to learn new things.” I thanked her for empowering me with the wisdom to conquer the accomplishments I have made along the way. She was an outstanding teacher, and now I had the encouragement and ability to succeed all the way to my college degree as a “Medical Assistant.” Before our conversation ended, she said to me, “Good luck in school! An education of any kind only helps you and makes you a better, stronger person…..”

Part 1 & Part 2 - Dead Poet Society - Notes From My Observations

Tradition~ Honor ~Wisdom ~Excellence ~Discipline Part 1 / Part 2

     Just as I observed in Stand & Deliver, The Dead Poet Society was very inspiring. It shows us to support children's self esteem, which is SO IMPORTANT. 
     As hard as it is to do, letting our children spread their wings can be a hard task for parents. Along with that, they will be able to accomplish their dreams and passions for life. They need to be able to say, "Carpe diem" and seize the day.
     It was Neil's father that pushed him to the breaking point and the after his death, the other boys from the Dead Poet Society shouldn't have let Mr. Keating take the fall for what Neil's father did.
     Mr. Keating was a passionate, caring and inspirational teacher. He instantly had the children's respect, unlike Mr. Escalante that had to earn the children's respect. The two movies differed in so many way. Both being that in Stand & Deliver the children had control of the school where in this movie the school was structured. I also observed that in this movie the kids had to stand up for a "Labeled" teacher where in Stand & Deliver, the teacher stood up for "Labeled" students. 

• The movie starts out in a church set back in a the 1950's, with a very organized program. The program director acknowledged the schools many accomplishments.
• It was an all boy school - some boys didn't want to leave their parents. Was children of tween - all ages.
• Mr. Perry was arguing with his father around other people, his dad wanted him to drop some extracurricular classes and not allow the boy to do what he wants. He is now having to drop the annual.
•  Perry tried to act as if it didn't bother him.
• The kids formed study groups for subjects such as Latin, Trig, etc.
• Trig teacher was strict with his rules.He would deduct one point off if late.
• Robin Williams played Mr. Keating - the English teacher tried to make teaching fun. He tried to joke with the student to lighten up the group. He tells the students they can call him "O Captain, My Captian"
• Mr. Pitts he joked about the kids name in front of other students.
• Mr. Keating kept repeating Carpe diem it is popularly translated as "seize the day"., make your lives extraordinary ( is a phrase from a Latin poem by Horace that has become an aphorism)
• In the evening the boys would study in the den as different groups.
• Knox lets the boys know that he met the most prettiest girl. 
• As the student read the understanding of poetry the teacher did a chart for notes on the board and then had the boys rip it out of their notebooks. And then he told them to rip out the entire introduction. He told the boys it was not the Bible, they wouldn't go to Hell for ripping out the papers.
• Mr. McAllister walked into the room when he heard laughter and fun, but when he found out that Mr. Keating was present, he stepped back.
• We don't read and write poetry because it is cute, we write poetry because we are part of the human race Mr. Keating tells the students.
• Mr. Keating was told by Mr. McAllister that he gave an enthustic class.
• Mr. Keating seems to be enthusiastic and loves poetry.
• The students asked Mr. Keating what the dead poet society was - he explained that those poets were sucking marrow out of the blood. Women drooled / swooned over the poetry.
• Mr. Keating whistled one tune all the time. Seems to be the same tune.
• Mr. McAllister the study hall teacher told the boys to stop chattering and sit down.
• The group of boys went out for the first time for the first dead poet society meeting in the woods. It was dark, spooky and they went inside a tree trunk They say around the group and told stories. 
• The boys chanted the poem like a song all the way back to school.
• The group of boys didn't get caught.
• Mr. Anderson didn't know the answer, so teacher went to Mr. Perry.
• Referred to Shakespear to a root canal.
• He tried to get the students interested by joking. As he read the poetry he made jokes. Mr. Keating stood on his desk to remind himself that he must look at things in a different way.
• Mr. Keating had the boys also stand on the desk.
• Mr. Keating assigned the students to write a poem of their own in addition to the essay.
• The two boys built a radio - "The Science Experiment"
• Neil knows for the first time in his life what he wants to do - be in a play A Mid-Summer Nights Dream
• Neil said he was going to do it whether his father allowed him or not. But his roommate talked the idea down. 
• The students when rowing were pushed to strive to there best. After all they had to row fast....
• Neal wants to act, whether his dad wants to let him or not. For the first time in his life he knows what he wants to do. Mr. Keating played a big role in his decision for acting.
• Neal tried to convince his roommate to do things like acting, but he didn't want to. Neal took his paper and started running in a circle around the room. Several other students chimed in on the act.
• The scene when Knox road his bike down the bank and birds flew away was very pretty :)
• Knox road his bike to the school where they were having a pep rally and he saw the girl he liked walk off with her boyfriend.
• Mr. Keating had his students line up - repeat lines of poetry and then kick the ball. Then he turned music on to collect inspiration from the students.
• Neal got the part as playing "Buck" in the play. He knew his father wouldn't approve, so he wrote letters of approval to be from his father and principle of the school.
• Neal was writing his poem for English and got discouraged.
• The student gets discouraged when reading his poem, but Mr. Keating encouraged him to continue and praised him for his efforts. The kids that was laughing, he made go next, it was a ordinary poem and he didn't get good scores from the teacher.
• Todd (Mr. Anderson) didn't write a poem. The teacher told him he thought he had something inside of him worth a great deal. Those are very inspirational words from a teacher.
• Todd referred to the picture of Walt Whitman as a scary mean mad man. Mr. Keating covered Todd's eyes and made him say his poem out loud. The class clapped and was impressed.
• Mr. Keating aloud the boys to play soccer and listen to loud opera music during English - the students adored their teacher.
• 2nd Dead Poets Society meeting and the boys gathered in the tree trunk.
• At the meeting the boy played the sax and then would resight the poem.
  
• Knox broke down and called the girl he liked - she invited him to the movie, he said the point he was making was the she was thinking about him. 
• Mr. Keating was making the boys walked around in circles and they were chanting marching songs.
• Neal found Todd. Todd let him know it was his birthday, he was disappointed in his gift because he got the same thing the year prior. It was a desk set!
• Neal convince Todd to through it off the roof top.
• The article in the school paper stirred up contrevesy in the private school. It was called profain and disrupptive article. They called a school meeting. During the meeting the phone rang and Mr. Doltan said that he got a call from God. That God said that they should be allowed to have girls at school. For punishment he was spanked with a board with wholes. The principle/ head master, Mr. Knoland wanted names.
• Charlie Dolton was to turn everyone in, and apologize to the school.
• Mr. Keating was being talked to by Mr. Knoland questioning him about his teaching methods. Mr. Keating was trying to explain for instants that the marching to proove a point. Mr. Knoland said he was to follow tradition and get them ready for college, the rest would follow it's self.
• Mr. Keating confronted the students. He felt it was not a Carm adiem moment, in fact it was a stupid move. He told Charlie that if the phone would have been collect from God, that would have been daring.
• When Neil got home from play practice, his father was waiting in the room. His father was MAD and he wouldn't let his son talk. He thought his teacher, Mr. Keating put him up to it. The father found out about this letter, he refused to quit. His father was stern, mean. 
• Neil went to seek advice from Mr. Keating about the play issue. Because he loved teaching he would rather be at school than with his girlfriend in London.
• Mr. Keating asked if he ever had a compassionate conversation with his dad. Neil said that his dad want listen to him and what he wants. He told Neil to go talk to him before tomorrow night.
• Todd went to a public high school to find the girl. The schools were very unorganized and the kids were not as structured as those attending the private boys school. 
• Bells rang in the halls of the private school, chatter chimed the halls as well. 
• Mr. Keating asked Neal if he talked to his father. Neal said that his father was out of town and was not able to make it. Neal never talked to his father--this you could tell. He was going to be in the play, regardless of his fathers words.
• Todd started to class and Chris, the girl of his dreams showed up. He took her outside because girls were not allowed in the school.
• Mr. Keating took the boys to the play to see Neil. Todd convinced Chris to go wtih him.
• Mr. Keating sat with the boys at the play, he was empressed with Neil's acting. 
• Neil's father showed up at the play. Made him very nervous.
• Neil stared at his dad while he resighted his play / poem part.
• The audience applauded for Neil his father not so happy, Neil was very happy.
• Explosions errupted with Neil and his father. The father told Mr. Keating to stay away from his son.
• Neil and his father went home, his mother stood inside looking at the window looking nervous as they walked in. The smell of cigarette smoke filled the room.'
• Neil's dad would take him out of school and enroll him military school. He would be a doctor, regardless of what he wanted. Neil stood up and tried to tell his father what he felt, he father cut him down before he could even talk.
• Because his father was forcing his son Neil to do things he didn't want to with his life, he took it away from his father.
• Mr. Keating was very hurt by this. The boys of the "Dead Poet Society" were heartbroken as well.
• Dean of schools spoke highly of Neil and he let the students know that he will be missed.
• The Dean wants to conduct an investigation into this matter.
• Administration think that Mr. Keating was responsible for Neil's death.
• The one boy said you can't save Keating, but you can save yourself and wanted them to go turn him in and let them know what he knows.
• On the way to the Dean's office Know gave Todd the Thumbs Up. 
• Todd was taken the the Dean's office, where his parents awaited his arrival. Todd didn't agree and was concerned wtih what was going to happen with Mr. Keating. He cried and questioned, but his dad was making him sign it.
• Mr. Keating came to say goodbye. He interuppted the class, and walked passed the empty desk where Neil used to sit. 
• The dean wanted him to read out of the book, but the page was ripped out. Mr. Keating smiled. On his way out, Mr. Keating was confronted by Todd, he knew what they did was wrong. Todd stood on the desk.
• Then all the students started to stand on their desks, stating Oh Captain, My Captain.
• The Dean couldn't get the children to sit down, the class was becoming unruly, they had no respect for the Dean and the beliefs of the school after "Labeling" Mr. Keating as a no good teacher. It made him very proud as he exited the classroom. After all that is what Neil would have done. Mr. Keating thanked the teacher for standing up for what they believed in, no matter the what the outcome of punishment was going to be.

 Compared to the movie I watched last week, Dead Poets Society difference from Stand &  Deliver by the following:

• The setting was more structure. No student dare step out of line in front of a teacher.
• The school was a private school and not a public school.
• It was when children had manners, unlike in the movie Stand & Deliver - they didn't have manners at first till the teacher showed them they could do anything.
• The teachers are similar because they try to make teaching fun and use visuals for learning.
• The teachers didn't label students, unlike the teaching staff in Stand & Deliver.
• The school started off by listing all the students that had made accomplishments - unlike Stand & Deliver it wasn't until the AP Calculus did the students make great accomplishments and was recognized by other teacher besides Mr. Escalante.

Rough Draft I / Thesis-Driven Essay: Observation On Education (paper II)

Michelle L. Jones
Dr. Sonia Begert
English 99
18 July 2011

     An Outstanding Teacher

     When Mrs. Montgomery was the sixth grade teacher at MacDonald Elementary, she was know as one of the school districts most outstanding teachers. She was accredited for her teaching skills because she was able to help her students set and meet goals, made learning fun and interesting, was an advocate for children’s self-esteem, always there for her students, and promoted life long learning that would follow students into adulthood.

     "We are the only ones responsible for our futures!", said Mrs. Montgomery as she helped us set and meet our goals. Often she would remind us that our goals should be set in small steps, this way we would be sure to succeed each one. She helped her students stay focused and emphasized her wisdom as she kept us mindful of our choices we would make that would reflect our futures. In the beginning of school year, she would have us write our goals down on a sheet of paper. Along with that, she would have us write a letter to ourselves. As we worked toward meeting our goals through the school year, she would walk and coach us, when needed every step of the way. During the summer she would mail the letters and your goal lists to you that she had you write the beginning of the school year. Being able to see all your accomplishments you achieved, prepared and empowered you for the next school year. As I sit here as an adult, I see all my educational achievements and owe a lot of my successions to Mrs. Montgomery for her dedication of being an outstanding teacher.

     I am sure we have all encountered “Boredom” of learning in the classroom, I know I sure had, until I met Mrs. Montgomery. She had the art of sparking imagination in all her students. No matter what subject, she opened creativity, and she always made sure it was fun and interesting.

     Our favorite history project our sixth grade year was learning different cultures of countries around the world. Mrs. Montgomery called it, “Dinner Around The World” and each group of students was assigned a country in which we had to prepare week long projects. Each group was to write a report and transform their school desks into the “Customs Booth” for their our assigned country. The table was to be displayed with the country’s flag, facts, and chart of statistics. On Friday, all groups were to bring in a special food dish to share with the class, that their country was known for. Since our group was assigned Sweden, our special food dish that my mom helped us make was Swedish meatballs.

     The next day our classroom looked like a International tourist trap. The aroma of food from American, Italian, Mexican, to Chinese filled the air and down the hallways. Our pretend passports were stamped at every customs booth and by the end of our day long adventure, we chased Leprechauns in Ireland, walked the Great Wall of China, danced the Polka in Poland, rowed in the Gondola down the Grand Canal of Venice in Italy, celebrated the Cinco de Mayo in Mexico, ran with the bulls in Spain, had tea and crumpets with the Queen of England, and toured The Eiffel Tower in Paris, France. By the time we arrived back in the United States, it was time to clean up and head home for the weekend.

     Along with the fun and exciting times, Mrs. Montgomery also had her serious side too. She was an advocate for children’s self-esteem and she believed that teachers played a major role in this development of a child. Mrs. Montgomery took pride in watching her students achieve. No matter if it was big or small, she would let you know how proud she was of you. When there were failures, she would encourage us to pick ourselves up and try again. To make us feel better, she would slip in a triumph or failure of her own, to let us know that if she made it this far she knew we could go even further. She had passion, encouragement, and a gentle way of helping everyone out in their own special way.

     Mrs. Montgomery was an inspiration to all her students. She always treated us as if we were her own children. Her love and compassion showed true in all she did for us. One of the very first things I remember her telling our sixth grade class was, “No matter what, I will always be here for you.”, and she held true to her word.

     For me, she has been there since my first day of arriving at MacDonald Elementary. She was my Science and English teacher for fifth grade as well. Knowing I had to repeat the fifth grade and having previous educational challenges, she knew of my frustrations and sadness. No matter what, she would always arrange special one on one time for me, as she did for all her students, when needed.

     Although 17 years has passed since I have communicated with Mrs. Montgomery, she has promoted life long learning that has followed me into adulthood. She would always tell our class that no matter what challenges come our way in life, to stay positive and you will be able to find the good out of any bad situation, and she also instilled in us that no matter how old you are, you are never to old to learn new things. For me this has been two, true statements that I am teaching to my own children today.

     I often wonder what she would say of my many accomplishments. I continue to find the good out of the many bad situations that have come my way. I have made my lemonade with the lemons God has given me. To talk to her today, she would be especially proud of me for coming back to school. She was right, you are never to old to learn new things. Not going to college right out of high school is my only regret in life, but I am sure proud of my decision to come back now. I have her to thank for my many accomplishments along the way, because she was an outstanding teacher, I have the encouragement and ability to succeed all the way to my college degree as a “Medical Assistant.”

Thesis Statement - One Paragraph (paper II)

Thesis Statement:    

     When Mrs. Montgomery was the sixth grade teacher at MacDonald Elementary, she was known as one of the school districts most outstanding teachers. She was accredited for her teaching skills because she was able to help her students set and meet goals, made learning fun and interesting, was an advocate for children’s self-esteem, always there for you, and promoted life-long learning that would follow students into adulthood.

One Paragraph:

     "We are the only ones responsible for our futures!", said Mrs. Montgomery. She helped us set and meet our goals, reminding us that they should be set in small steps, this way we would be sure to succeed each one. She helped her students stay focused and emphasized her wisdom as she kept us mindful of our choices we would make that would reflect our futures. In the beginning of school year, she would have us write our goals down on a sheet of paper. Along with that, she would have us write a letter to ourselves. As we worked toward meeting our goals through the school year, she would walk and coach us when needed every step of the way.

Thesis Statement - Outline (paper II)

An Outstanding Teacher

     When Mrs. Montgomery was the sixth grade teacher at MacDonald Elementary, she was known as one of the school districts most outstanding teachers. She was accredited for her teaching skills because she was able to help her students set and meet goals, made learning fun and interesting, was an advocate for children’s self-esteem, always there for you, and promoted life-long learning that would follow students into adulthood.

1.       Mrs. Montgomery helped students set and meet goals.

A)     She had students write goals down in small steps, so all could be accomplished.

B)      She had students write a letter, addressed to them-selves and at the end of the school year you would receive the letter in the summer, where you could see your goals met and it made you feel inspired and empowered for the next school year.

2.       Mrs. Montgomery made learning fun and interesting.

A)     She sparked imagination in all her students. She took the term “BOREDOM” out learning.

B)      My favorite history lesson was “Around the World” where each group of students was assigned a country and a special project was given for class / group participation.

3.       Mrs. Montgomery was an advocate for children’s self-esteem.

A)     She believed teachers played a major role in the development of children’s self-esteem.

B)      When failures occurred, she never gave up on you. Instead, she was full of encouragement and motivation.

4.       Mrs. Montgomery was always there for her students.

A)     She treated all her students as if they were her own children.

B)      She was there for me through my repeat of fifth grade and all through high school.

5.       Mrs. Montgomery promoted life-long learning that followed students into adulthood.

A)     She taught us that no matter what challenges present themselves along the path we take in life, to make sure we stay positive and find the good out of the bad.

B)      She taught us that no matter how old we are, you are never too old to learn new things.

Thesis Statement - Stand & Deliver / One Paragraph

     Mr. Escalante was an inspirational teacher at Garfield High School, because he made teaching interesting, he boosted students self-esteem, he was always there for his students, and he stood up for the students rights.

1. Mr. Escalante made teaching interesting

    A. Used apple for fractions.
    B. Used the Gigelow math problem for algebra problem.

2. Mr. Escalante boosted students self-esteem.

   A. He showed Poncho that he can do the math.
   B. Gave words of encouragement to keep the children motivated during the AP Calculus learning.

3. Mr. Escalante was always there for his students.

   A. Talked to Anna's father about her staying in school.
   B. Did last minute studying for re-taking of test and cooked dinner for the students so they could study
       longer.

4. Mr. Escalante stood up for the students rights.

    A. When they were being accused of cheating.
    B. He didn't allow other facility to cut the student down / "Label" the students.

     After the students successfully passed the AP calculus exam, the morale inn the school had changed. Until one day the Educational Testing Officers falsely accused them of cheating on the original test. Mr. Escalante immediately stood up for the students rights and never gave up on them. All the students agreed to retake the test, but were only given one day to review. Mr. Escalante showed pure inspiration as he and the students spent countless hours together. Mr. Escalante even cooked dinner for the students as they continued to review for the AP Calculus exam. It was a very small kitchen, everyone was hot and tired. Frustrations arouse and Mr. Escalante continued to joke with the students to relax the atmosphere. The students contributed to his humor and Angel said, "Lets order out."

Stand & Deliver - My Thoughts and Observations

The last three days of observing the movie, Stand and Deliver, gave me lots of inspiration. I observed a school that was much like Mike Rose attended. The facility had the students LABELED and it doesn't give them full advantage for them to be all that they can be. Having a teacher in the school system that is able to stand up for the students, seeing that they have full potential means a lot. I have experienced a school with bad teaching structure and the damage that it does to your self-esteem, can effect you for a lifetime.

I observed that in the beginning the students didn't have no respect for the teacher, until he pushed them to their full capacity. After giving them the support and structure that they were needing, did the teacher win the respect he deserved. This teacher was always there for his students, made learning fun and stood behind the students, especially when they were being falsely accused. It is a shame that other teacher out there have to label children. Everyone has a special talent, we just have to find our forte in life!

After watching this movie, it motivated me to get my thesis-driven essay on Observed Education. I looked forward to perfecting it over the upcoming week.

Part 1 -3 of Stand and Deliver - Observations Of Teaching from Part 1-3 of Stand and Deliver

Part 1 of Stand and Deliver, I observed the following teaching structure:
Part 2 of Stand and Deliver, What I observed today , COMPARED to what I observed yesterday:
Part 3 of Stand and Deliver,  What kind of teacher was Mr. Escalante is?

• The atmosphere was similar to the stories we read about in the Literacy Narrative by Mike Rose. The children did what ever they wanted. Adversity filled the school. (examples: there were still troubled students inside the school, but there was only three that I observed)
• Segregated students for those that could only speak Spanish and not both Spanish and English, and he made the students that could only speak Spanish sit in the front of the rows and moved everyone back.(example: it seems that the students are sitting together as a group, no matter what language they spoke; the teacher feels that the children are once again being Segregated because of their raise)
• Made teaching fun, but visual learning. He came dressed up like a butcher and chopped an apple to show example of fractions; referencing hole in sand as a positive and a negative. (examples: he passed around oranges to have them have visual with math problems; the teacher continued to make jokes)
• The teacher, although in the right - confronted the student with attitude. He was tired of the students having control. He wanted classroom order.(examples: the teacher finally had the students respect he earned by being there for them and standing up for them)
• The teacher was trying to help the students set goals. (example: talking to the dad about her daughter, Anna, being the first in her family to graduate from college. she was having to quit school to work.)
• The teacher didn't want to allow other teachers to "Label" the students. The teacher continued to stand up for what he felt the children were capable of studying and passing (example: calculus, the one teacher walks out because she was totally against even giving the student a chance. She was afraid of it hurting there self confidence)
• The teacher had structural teaching. 
• If the students didn't participate in class, homework, tests = the chair, where they would have to sit in front of the class which was humiliating. (example: the girl that didn't participate had a lot of responsibility of raising her siblings, cooking, cleaning, etc. When she tried to do her work, her parent, the mother for example was so tired she had to turn off the light and she couldn't see to do the homework,etc.; today the student was sleeping and the teacher took the students hat off, but since the student knew the answer he allowed him to go back to sleep)
• If a student was late for class, the students would humiliate and the teacher would make rude comments. He didn't have time to allow for interruptions during class - there were children that wanted to learn. Attendance was very important in learning and getting the most out of the education.
• Liked to have total class participation (example: the students all participated for the AP Calculus test, but once accused of cheating they all stood up with the teacher and agreed to retake the test to prove they didn't do anything)
• When the teacher said he wanted to teach Calculus the following year - other facility didn't believe in the students. They already had them labeled as students that were not going to make it in the real world. (example: he is standing up for the students with the AP Calculus tests)
• Students were still having to convince the parents to allow them to take the class. They would rather them be at home and they were not helping them set goals.
• The school was locked up tight.
• One student walked out because she was humiliated that the teacher was using her personal life to entertain the class. But the teacher walks out to get her, he is there for her unlike the teacher Audre had that put her in the corner for breaking her glasses by accident, etc.;
• The student gets frustrated, the student said he is the dumbest, but the teacher steps in and gives them more challenges.
• The student was late for class because of taking care of grandma, the teacher wouldn't listen to excuses. Told student to get out. During dinner time the student showed up, he really wants to do this class.  By this you can see the teacher is making a huge difference in a students life.
• This teacher really cares, his wife states he works 60 hours a week and volunteers to work night;  schools. (example: even when he was laid up in the hospital, he had the nurse take him to the classroom)
• When the teacher didn't show up to teach class, the one student tried to take over. The students are worried about their teacher. The students start arguing.
• The new teacher steps in, the students are not happy about this. (example: the class was really down up until the teacher came back to class as a surprise.)
• When the teacher quizzes the students and they get the answer right he praises them, even if they don't know the answer, he makes them work even harder.
• Test results for the Calculus came back and it was announced that all 18 students that took the test, passed the test.
• The students gave the teacher an award at the press conference, the teacher was well liked and thought of in the school district. (in addition to giving the teacher an award, the kids also fixed up his VW bug for him)
• A letter was received in the mail about cheating on the test, they were labeling them too.
• Having received this letter really hurt the self esteem of the students. (example: the kids being pulled over by the cops, the other student upset about his car, etc.)
• The Principle and the testing committee questioned the children - accusing them of cheating. The students keep telling them they didn't do anything. They wanted those to confess, and having the teachers sense of humor, the students make the joke about getting the test ahead of time from his old man and he is decomposing in his locker.
• Just because the kids got done with the tests early and little multiple choice answer wrong - the department of testing feeling the students cheated. They want the kids to be retested - the teacher is saying NO WAY.
• The day of testing the students were very nervous, you could tell they didn't want to be judged.
•  Mr. Escalante was an outstanding teacher. 
• At the end of the movie it showed that at Garfield High School - as each year passed the student ratio that passed the AP Calculus test grew higher.

Thesis Statement from Audre Lorde's "From Zami: A New Spelling of My Name"

Audre Lorde;s teacher, Sister MPH, was a mean teacher because she hit students, segregated them into "good" and "bad" groups, didn't want to help those who were struggling, and humilated students.

1. Sister MPH hit students

• she wanted to hurt them
• sent Audre home with a note, asking her mother not to dress her in so many layers, so that Audre could feel the paddling more.

     2. Sister MPH segregated them into "good" and "bad" groups.

• when Audre would read but not understand numbers, she quickly got lost
• Sister MPH made her sit in the back with the "bad" group, "Brownies"

      3. Sister MPH didn't want to help those who were struggling.

• when Alvin, Audre's classmate, couldn't read, he was put in the "Brownies"
• when Audre broke her glasses and couldn't see, and instead of pairing Audre with another student that could help, she made her sit in the back with a dunce cap

__________________________________________________________________________________

OR it can become a debate: 

Audre Lorde's didn't give sufficient evidence that Sister MPH was mean and discriminatory. The nuns don't have time to pay attention to particular students, must keep a strict schedule, and indeed gave each student the opportunity to move to "the head of the class."

Cheers To Paper #2 ~ Thesis Statement

Well, after writing my literacy narrative, which will make writing this paper a little easier.

I just turned in my report - The Importance of Self-Esteem, referencing back to my elementary years in the first school I attended. I did not have good teachers, this being said, I will continue forward to write my thesis continuing my story about my favorite teacher.

Mrs. Montgomery was the most outstanding teacher of all times, because she was dedicated to children (s) education and not just about her well being. She didn't care about whether she had to spend one on one time with a particular child. If you needed her - even after you were out of her class and advanced to the new grade... she was always there for you.

Her teaching style was awesome. She would always have special projects for each topic. The best time I ever had in her classroom was when she was teaching us about different countries around the world. For this project she had us do a cooking venture and each student was assigned a dish to bring in. Sweden was my topic and for my dish Swedish meatballs that my mom helped me make.

Mrs. Montgomery knew about my horrible elementary past and she was also able to help me through those hard times I would face from time to time. She helped students set goals and achieve each one.

No matter what the situation, we always found the good out of the bad. Till this very day, I do the same thing. We must all count our many daily blessings.

I admire her so much and think of her often, especially now that I am a mother. She may have been my teacher, but her positve influences will never be forgotten.

From Zami: "A New Spelling of My Name" by Audre Lordee

Well - Sister Mary of Perpetual Help sound like she is related to the "Wicked Witch" of Fairview Elementary and her evil twin sister in so many way. This is another fine example of how a teacher can crush a child's self-esteem. I read the thesis statement and feel she is the second kind of educator I referred to in my Literacy Narrative.

This evening while doing my homework, I read this allowed to mom my - who also attended a Catholic School. She said that if you have never been to a Catholic School, to stand clear in all directions because the nuns are just as Audre Lorde describes. In "A New Spelling of My Name" I made a list of the poor teaching structures and punishments that Sister MPH had as a teacher:

~gives kids the strap

~made judgement on children using racial / color usage

~divided children by their abilities "Fairies and Brownies"

~labeled children

~downgraded / belittled children

~made them wear a dunce cap

~made fun of her in front of the other students

Just as I mentioned in my Literacy Narrative, along with parents and grandparents, teachers are also our earliest influences. 

The Importance Of Self-Esteem - Final Draft

Importance of Self Esteem

     Teachers play a major role in the development of a child’s self-esteem, as with any profession, the education system is made up of two kinds of educators, those who dedicate and those who prefer summers off. I traces my self-esteem issues to the second type of teacher.
     My low self-esteem issues began in the Fall of my third grade year. It was here I would experience comprehension problems and declining grades. I was afraid to take my graded papers home and scared of my teachers. As a young girl, I was still forming my ability to adapt, regulate my emotions and find my voice. My ultimate demise came at my third grade parents teacher conference. I was sent out of the room. The disappointed look on my parent‘s face said it all. There I was, an eight year old child who knew she would never be good enough for the teachers or her parents.
     The summer before fourth grade proved to be one of punishment from my performance the year before. That horrible year seemed to follow me like a predator stalking its prey. As I sit here now as an adult, I still remember those horrible days. Fourth grade was a year of “Special” help. I was singled out for the “extra help” with discouraged looks from the teachers, the other students, and especially my family.
     My fourth grade teacher was like the “Wicked Witch” of Fairview Elementary School. She was already coming across as unfriendly and now I needed to ask for help. She of course was never available so that I could get the help needed because she was always with the Enrichment Students and I felt so intimidated to ask again for help. Odds were that by the time class was about over, she had forgotten that I had even asked anyways. I was forced to sit there and listen to the “Wicked Witch” of Fairview Elementary School. She was one of the most unfriendly, unavailable, hopeless teachers a child could have. The “Enrichment” kids were held up on a pedestal, their every whim catered to. She would intimidate and talk down to me as if I were dirt on the bottom of her shoes. Wouldn’t she ever remember that a scared little girl needed to ask a question? Would she remember that little girl who was classified to be “not as smart” as her fellow peers and wanted to please everyone?
     I would let my parents know everyday after school. I hated going to school. I hated my teacher! Just as the year before, same complaint, just another year. I often wondered if anyone else in my class was having similar problems. You’ve heard a child’s complaint of their teacher before. The comments like, “I don’t like that teacher.” or “I really enjoy school and my teacher this year.”  For me I would often hear back “It is not nice to say that about your teacher.”
     Teachers have a huge impact on children. They have our children in class five days out of a week for about six hours a day. There I was, subjected to 30 hours a week of damaging self-esteem. I started to become very discouraged with figuring things out. I felt alone and lost, like I had just jumped in the rabbit hole to join the tea party with Alice. I didn’t know which direction to take. It was an emotional rollercoaster ride. Here I was struggling, when my older sister kept bringing home achievements. I would always hear of her accomplishments and it was not that I did not want to have the same things. I couldn’t get them.
     My Grandma Grace dedicated her time to helping us with homework. She could see I had reading comprehension issues and just needed someone that would be able to give me that little extra push. No matter how long it took grandma and I, she would sit with me each night until all homework or studying was done. Some children would have dreaded this time, but I looked forwarded to it each night. Finally I was getting some help and I appreciated every minute of it.  Eventually she even hired me a tutor when needed.
     Fifth grade quickly arrived and I thought I was ready. Little did I know, the work was going to be a little bit harder and we would be switching classes. Not only did I have the “Wicked Witch” of Fairview Elementary School again for some rotating classes, but I had her evil twin for my fifth grade teacher. Before the end of my first week of fifth grade, my troubles had already begun. It was going to be a long school year.                                
     I immediately went home and let my parents know all that was going on, and they came to school.  Apparently the teachers had conversations about me before school had even begun, and I felt at that very moment I just wanted to disappear. I was not a bad child. I behaved in school. I did not understand what made me such a problem. They wanted me to be tested because they agreed that I was “mentally handicapped”. It was a total nightmare for me. They went as far as wanting me tested at the county mental health clinic.
     It was a cold winter break, the tree branches were all iced over. While other children were able to stay home to play with their Christmas toys and enjoy the fresh fallen snow, I was having to get ready for the meeting with the mental health doctor. I didn’t want to go! I remember being called back to the doctor’s room. I felt like I was walking down the hall that would never end, and when the door shut, it sounded like a tomb was just sealed for eternity. Then out came the paper and pen and flashcards, and he asked tons of questions. I let him know exactly how I felt, how the teachers made me feel. There was nothing wrong with me, and the doctor agreed. He reported back to the school district as well. I was vindicated! I was so happy when school ended, except I failed fifth grade.
     It was the first day of school for the new year. I was depressed having to repeat the fifth grade. My classmates were moving on, I was sure to be teased. Right before we were to catch the bus, my dad let me know I wouldn’t be riding the bus that day. He said, “You will be attending MacDonald Elementary School from now on, and we would like to take you to meet your teachers.” Mixed emotions overwhelmed my mind. Finally my parents were taking me out of that “Institution”! I was scared to death, but just like Mike Rose, I knew from that point on my education was going to be my responsibility. In order to have a future I was going to have to set higher goals. My life was going to be what I made of it, not how a teacher made me feel about myself. A new year, a new school, a new beginning!
     My prayers were answered when I came home my first day to let my family know about my great day, and I was excited to return. No longer was I afraid of the teachers, I was receiving the same help my grandma was able to give me, I was not being embarrassed in from of my classmates and I was no longer being treated like a “labeled” student.
     How many of you remember your favorite teacher or your not so favorite teacher? Just like I remember the “Wicked Witch” of Fairview Elementary School and her evil twin, I also remember my favorite teacher, Mrs. Montgomery. She helped me build my goals toward succeeding through school after my horrible experience and because of her and all of the encouragement she gave me along the way, I received A’s and B’s throughout the rest of my school years and graduated top 20 of the Class of 1994. This shows how important teachers roles play in education along with self-esteem. Along with our parents and grandparents, teachers are also our earliest influences.

My Literacy Narrative "Importance of Self-Esteem" Rough Draft

Michelle L. Jones
Dr. Sonia Begert
English 99
18 July 2011

Importance of Self Esteem

     Teachers play a major role in the development of a child (s) self-esteem, as with any profession, the education system is made up of educators whom are dedicated and those that prefer summers off. My low self-esteem issues began in the fall of my third grade year. It was here I would experience comprehension problems and declining grades. I was afraid to take papers home and scared of my teachers. As a young girl, I was still forming my ability to adapt, regulate my emotions and find my voice.

     My ultimate demise came at my third grade parent teacher conference. I was sent out of the room. The disappointed look on my parent's faces said it all. There I was, an eight year old child who knew she would never be good enough for the teachers or her parents. 

      The summer before fourth grade proved to be one of punishment from my performance the year before. That horrible year seemed to follow me like a predator stalking its prey. As I sit here now as an adult, I still remember those horrible days. Fourth grade was a year of "special" help. I was singled out for the “extra help” with discouraged looks from the teachers, the other students and especially my family. My fourth grade teacher was like the “Wicked Witch” of Fairview Elementary School. She was already coming across as unfriendly and now I needed to ask for help. She of course was never available so that I could get the help needed because she was always with the Enrichment Students and I felt so intimidated to ask again for help. Odds were that by the time class was about over, she had forgotten that had even asked anyways. I forced to sit there an listen to the "Wicked Witch" of Fairview Elementary. She was one of the most unfriendly, unavailable, hopeless teachers that a child could have. The "Enrichment" kids were held up on a pedestal, their every whim catered to. She would intimidate and talk down to me as if I were dirt on the bottom of her shoes. Would she ever remember that a scared little girl needed to ask a question? Would she remember that little girl who was classified to be " not as smart" as her fellow peers and wanted to please everyone?

      I would let my parents know everyday after school. I hated going to school. I hated my teacher! Just as the year before, same complaint, just another year. I often wondered if anyone else in my class was having similar problems. You’ve heard a child complain of their teacher before. The comments like, “I don’t like that teacher.” or “I really enjoy school and my teacher this year.”  For me I would often hear back “It is not nice to say that about your teacher.”, my voice still left unheard.

      Teachers have a huge impact on children, they have our children in class 5 days out of a week for about six hours a day. There I was, subjected to 30 hours a week of damaging self-esteem. I started to become very discouraged with figuring things out. I felt alone and lost, like I had just jumped in the rabbit hole to join the tea party with Alice. I didn’t know which direction to take. I was an emotional train ride. Here I was struggling, when my older sister kept bringing home achievements. I would always hear of her accomplishments and it was not that I did not want to have the same things.  

    My Grandma Grace dedicated her time helping me with homework. She could see I had reading comprehension issues and just needed someone that would be able to give me that little extra push. No matter how long it took, grandma would sit with me each night until all homework or studying was done. Some children would have dreaded this time, but I looked forwarded to it each night. Finally, I was getting some help, I appreciated every minute of it.  Eventually, she even hired me a tutor when needed.

      Fifth grade arrived and I thought I was ready. Little did I know, the work was going to be a little bit harder and we would be switching classes. Not only did I have the “Wicked Witch” of Fairview Elementary again for some subjects, but I had her evil twin for my fifth grade teacher. Before the end of my first week of fifth grade my troubles had already begun, it was going to be a long school year.

     I immediately went home and let my parents know all that was going on, and they came to school.  Apparently the teachers had conversations about me before school had even begun and I felt at that very moment I just wanted to disappear. I was not a bad child, I behaved in school. I was not understanding what made me such a problem. They wanted me to be tested because they agreed that I was “mentally retarded”.  It was a total nightmare for me. They went as far as wanting me tested at the county mental health clinic.

      It was a cold winter break, the tree branches were all iced over. While other children were able to stay home to play with their Christmas toys and enjoy the fresh fallen snow, I was having to get ready for the meeting with the mental health doctor. I didn’t want to go! I remember being called back to the doctors room. I felt like I was walking down the hall that would never end and when the door shut, it sounded like a tomb was just sealed for eternity. Then out came the paper and pen, flashcards and he asked tons of questions. I let him know exactly how I felt, how the teachers made me feel. There was nothing wrong with me and the doctor agreed, he reported back to the school district as well, I was vindicated! I was so happy when school ended that year, except I failed fifth grade.

      It was the first day of a new year, I was depressed having to repeat the fifth grade. All my classmates were moving on, I was sure to be teased. Right before we were to catch the bus, my dad let me know I wouldn’t be riding the bus to school because I would be attending MacDonald Elementary and they wanted to take me to meet my teachers. Mixed emotions overwhelmed my mind, finally my parents were taking me out of that  “institution”! I was scared to death, but just like Mike Rose, I knew from that point on my education was going to be my responsibility. In order to have a future I was going to have to set higher goals. My life was going to be what I made of it, not how a teacher made me feel about myself. A new year, a new school, a new beginning!

      My prayers were answered when I came home my first day to let my family know about my great day and I was excited to return. No longer was I afraid of the teachers, I was receiving the same help my grandma was able to give me and I was not being embarrassed in front of my classmates. I was no longer being treated like a “labeled” student.  

      How many of you remember your favorite teacher or your not so favorite teacher? Just like I remember the “Wicked Witch” of Fairview Elementary and her evil twin, I also remember my favorite teacher, Mrs. Montgomery. She helped me build goals toward succeeding through school after my horrible experience and because of her and all of her encouragement she gave me along the way, I received A’s and B’s throughout the rest of my school years and graduated top 20 of the Class of 1994. This shows how important teachers roles play in education along with self esteem. Along with our parents and grandparents, teachers are also our earliest influences.

The Autobigraphy of Benjamin Franklin, Part 1

     Benjamin Franklin, just like Malcolm X, both were self taught or should that be self educated? Mike Rose went to a public school were there was a lot of diversity and disfunction, which in turn made Mike Rose also have to self educate himself as well. All three authors had to overcome educational challenges and set higher goals to achieve a their futures. Mike Rose's narrative is confussing, Malcolm X's narrative is somewhat easy to understand and Ben Franklin's narrative even though written in Old English, I was able to read - parts were broken down to the different parts of his life / event.

     Deciding which narrative I enjoyed reading the most is a toss up. When I read Malcom X's narrative, I felt power and determination. His accomplishments are outstanding and he took the right steps to complete his goals. However, I have decided out of the three narratives, I enjoyed reading Benjamin Franklin's the most.

     I have always found interest in American History, and not only does his narrative tell about his life, but it has the English they used, how they used trade for jobs, etc.  It truely shows how times have changed in society. How many of us would appreciate our parents placing us in and out of schools, making us work their trades and not following our own hearts. You read this throughout the autobiography that Benjamin Franklin he was taken in and out of school to work, but he opened his own print shop. How amazing is that, especially at that age? What child of today at this age could do that? It again reinforces and shows how times have truely changed. Although the narrative is written in Old English, he his life down into parts where you were able to read and understand it better.

My One Paragraph For My Ed. Narrative Using "modes" of CUBING

     Just like Mike Rose, I knew my education was my responsibility and I had to set higher goals so that I was not considered "AVERAGE", since teachers had me already labeled as a student. No longer would I have to be afraid of teachers that embarrassed me in front of my classmates, making me feel belittled like I would never amount to anything in life. It was to be a "New Year, New School, New Beginning" for me. My education from this point on was going to be what I made of it. I attended fifth grade over again at MacDonald Elementary School. My prayers were answered when I was able to come home my first day of school to let my family know about my great day and how excited I was to return.

"I Just Wanna Be Average" Part 1 by Mike Ross

     The whole time I read Mike Rose's narrative on "I Just Wanna Be Average", I kept thinking about my Literacy Narative on "Importance Of Self Esteem".  Where is elementary school, my teachers had me labeled from third grade through fifth grade in one particular elementary school that I attended in the country where I grew up.  The teachers at Our Lady of Mercy for Mike Rose and the other students had them labeled for no potential and felt they were the reasons why the school system allowed them to fail.

     Labeling students like these teachers that seemed to be incompetent to see the students real potentials can be very damaging to students. For Rose he seemed not interested in school, very bored and his fellow students it seemed to make them not care about school and started acting out in school, causing sometime explosive situations. When you get behind on subjects, it is because you have lack of motivation and in Mike Rose's situation, he didn't know which direction to go with the subject. It doesn't really state in Part 1 where Mike Rose gets behind in Math, but I would by my opinion I would say he was bored do to the lack of structure within the school by the teachers and other students."

     High school can be disorienting to students, like Ken Harvey, because no matter how bad the school, you're going to encounter notions that don't fit with the assumptions and beliefs that you grew up with - including like the article states "dissonant notions from teachers, maybe other students. And you will also be thrown into a mixture a backgrounds, places of rich ethics and linguistic mix.

     For me what I find disorienting about college would be: making the decision to do so; finding class; getting over the overwhleming feeling of the first week / month; meeting all the new people of mixed ages and all the homework. To lessen the feelings of disorientation, my best advice is B R E A T H E  and know that it is all done in steps. College is all about taking steps to get to your degree and with this being said.... we can't take all the steps at once, yet one step at a time.

     The success of our education is up to us, don't ever allow anyone to "LABEL" you as a student. Set your goals high and reach for the stars.

A Successful Strategy For Developement I've Used In The Past (Pg. 28-29 Writing Simplified)

     Time and time again, looking back on my writing projects over the years - I have continued to use clustering. It is my all time favorite, most successful strategy for developement in writing. As I mentioned in a past blog, my grandma would keep journals when we would go on vacation with her. We would sit at the end of our day and do clustering to map our way back through our adventures together. Not only was it fun to do, but educational as well.

     I have continued to journal from the time I met my husband up until present as a keepsake for my children and future grandchildren. I have continued to use the clustering method that grandma thought me years ago.

    Clustering is very useful in exploring various angles on topics I have decided to write about in the past / present, and also emphasizes between ideas. I refer clustering to off-roading... you are at your starting point, but you end up here and there. This one word leads you to many pathways and alleys. You just never know where it will lead you!

Unit 1 Section 27. Exercises (Writing Paragraphs)

Section 27. Exercises (Writing Paragraphs)

A. Questions About Paragraphs

1.)Guidelines are 4-6 sentences for the average length of a paragraph in today’s fast-

paced world.

2.)A good topic sentence expresses your opinion, is stated clearly, and is brief. It is the one sentence that controls the entire paragraph. It establishes tone, attitude of the writer by stating the main point.

3.)A unifying idea is a word / group of words that indicate the main point that the rest of the paragraph will emphasize.

4.)analyze ~ structure of a paragraph ~ is my topic sentence clear ~ offer sufficient support ~ details, example, flowing paragraphs ~ clearly connected ideas

B. Fact vs. Opinion
Facts for sentences w/ verifiable facts: 1,4,6,7,9,11,14

Opinions for sentences that are essentially personal value: 2,3,5,8,10,12,13

1.) No

2.) Date, history, statement

3.) Look up online, history, news, etc.

4.)That is a sentence w/ personal feelings.

5.)I choose as follows:

#8 Pearl Harbor - disagree - was a stragic event in history and for our Nation and for Japan. Many lives lost that didn’t need to be. Sad day in history!! History / online

#13 Hank Aaron - disagree - I don’t really care for baseball that much.

#10 Harriet Tubman - agree - Brave and ambitious. She guided the Combahee River Riad that liberated more than 700 slaves in S. Carolina

C. Paragraph Structure

Punishment For Drunk Drivers

1. DUI is more than a simple traffic violation.

A. WA state class DUI as gross misdeameanor

2. Penalty will get tougher for drivers w/ prior DUI

A. Offenders spend at least 30 days in jail, with fines and 60 days on electric detention

B. Must have an ignition interlock in order to start your car.

State Government should increase the punishment that drunk drivers rec. whether it’s a 1^st, 2^nd or 3^rd time offense.

D. Sentence Sorting

Kicking A Bad Habit

1.Quitting smoking makes a difference right away.

A. When people quit smoking, they can taste and smell food better.

B. Their breath smells better and they get rid of their cough.

2. Clearly, quitting smoking is the wise thing to do.

A. Their smoking harms not only themselves, but also their family members, co-

workers, and others who breathe their cigarette smoke.

B. Secondhand smoke from a parent can also increase a child’s chances for middle ear

problems, causes coughing and wheezing, and worsens asthmatic conditions.

Smoker’s should quit.

1.) At first, it was a little overwhelming.

2.) I am still unsure, but pretty sure, it expressed opinion

3.) yes

E. Paragraph Development

F. Group Activity

G. Evaluating Paragraphs

1.) Parents Should Not Drink Irresponsibily

2.) Drinking themselves into a stupor, driving while drink / after drinking, fighting while drinking.

3.) If the parent can do it, so can they.

?4.)That children may not want to be like their parents.

?5.)Stating that adults may want there own lives but they must realize that they set examples for there children that can last a lifetime..

1.) Playing a musical instrument may improve a person’s intelligence.

2.) What become known as the Mozart Effect.

?3.) The children who received piano lessons scored 37 percetn higher on spatial reasoning tests than the other children who were matched in IQ.

?4.) These studies seem to undeniably prove a link between musical training and a person’s intelligence.

?5.) In one group received piano lessons, a second group received computer training, and the third group received nothing

?6.)

Unit 1 Section 9. Exercises (The Writing Process)

Section 9. Exercises (The Writing Process)

A. Exercise 1

Student’s Self - Evaluation of Writing Skills and Practices


Strengths in grammar, punctuation, composition: I’m creative with words and ideas
Weakness in grammar, punctuation, composition: I get very wordy on one thing, may bounce around
Things I like about writing: How it makes me feel. It is like a blank piece of canvas to paint.
Things I dislike about writing: Writer block
Good habits in writing and study skills: Organization, determination
Bad habits in writing and study skills: Getting frustrated, disappointing myself, misunderstanding directions

B. Exercise 2

1.) I love being to express thoughts and using your imagination. Seeing ideas come to life. What frustrates me the most is writers block. Lately it seems I suffer a lot from this but hope this class will help.

2.) The longest assignment I ever had to write was my Jr. Thesis. In order to pass 11^th grade my History Teacher, Mr. Amato assigned topics. I was hopeful because other classmates were being assigned fun and interesting people, please, and what did I get assigned…. The Panama Canal. I thought to myself, great this is 80% of my Jr. grade to become a senior. I get to write on dirt, water and the makings of a ditch. I had to write a thesis in all stages. From planning to the final draft. My audience consisted of my History, Home Economics and English teacher. I passed my thesis, became a senior and while writing the thesis found that the Panama Canal was more than just dirt, water and the making of a ditch. It is history!

3.) Without writing, I think I’d be lost. Writing to me is like an unpainted canvas waiting to be painted. I love writing and have since I was a child. It is a way for me to get all my feelings out in the open. My biggest hinder is the road blocks from time to time.

C. Exercise 3

Planning & Prewriting will be the easiest for me because I love look back and thinking of happy times using my creativity and ideas - making them come to life.

What I find difficult is saying to much about one thing so drafting.

Finalizing everything into the final stages for me, afraid I am taking out what means the most.













































































　

Pre-Writing I've Used Successfully In The Past

It is like we are quilters designing a quilt top with fabric all over the floor or a musician waiting to hit that one right note..... pre-writing is much similar.

Countless hours after dinner my grandmother would sit at the dining room table and help me with my homework. She would help me with my English homework every night, no matter how long it took, she was there to help me succeed. Call me crazy, but I looked forward to growing up. When I had to do book reporters I can remember her helping me with outlines.

Growing up, every other year we would get to go on vacation with our grandparents - somewhere far away from home. A great adventure, somewhere we had never been. My grandma would journal our trips and we would write them together. She told me to have a journal, that it is a great way to preserve your memories. She would cluster a lot and we would have so much fun doing that together.... It helped up map our way back through our day.

Learning Beyond Formal Education

December 13, 2005 my husband became ill. It was a life changing event for my family and I. I went from a housewife / stay - at - home mom to a full time employee, and a caregiver / nurse for my husband.

There have been countless hours of caring for him, changing bandages, traveling for medical trips and then came the hardest task of all.... giving my husband three shots. This is my accomplishment of learning beyond formal education.

The doctor asked me to come to the office for the afternoon and a nurse in between patience showed me the ropes. Out came all the supplies and when she popped the top off that needle, I thought there is no way I am going to be able to give him shots with that. It was no diabetic needle, these needles had to get in the muscles of his legs. I was so scared.  I accomplished what I went there for.....   I joked with my husband, "Now if you make me really mad, I will be able to give you these three shots really quick." It felt so good to laugh together! I became really good at this, and just having that feeling knowing that I was finally being able to help him was Heaven sent to me.

That is why I am here at Olympic Community College today. I thanked Kenny, even though his illness is a horrible situation and I want him better more than anything in the whole world - but if it were not for his illness and my experience with the nurse that day, I would not have set out this new goal to become a Medical Assist to help other people. It is truly a wonderful feeling!